My Yoga Class
Usually, I don’t take a yoga class at the gym. I often find the session challenging for my body, which resists bending and stretching, unlike my classmates, who seem to manage it easily. But for some reason I can’t fully explain, I had a desire to take this class, which referred to the 1-hour yoga class as “restorative.” That sounded gentle enough for me to endure. It was, and I was glad that I had made the decision. But it is the pearls of wisdom the yoga teacher shared with us, the challenges she gently presented, and the invitation to think more deeply that I wanted to share with you. I believe that when considered through the eyes of grief, the thoughts offer comfort and encouragement for the grief journey.
Pearl of wisdom #1
After getting into a challenging yoga pose, my body began the parade of physical signs reflective of my internal thought of “let’s get this pose over with!” The grimace, the loss of balance at one point, and the verbal “ouch” offered by me and some of my fellow students led the teacher to observe that many of us just wanted to end the pose. In a gentle, soothing voice, she said: “Remember, everything has a beginning, middle, and end”. She encouraged us to think about that during the pose, to focus on the benefit of each phase, to take what we could from the challenge of holding the pose.
And so it is with grief and loss. It too has a beginning, middle, and end. With grief, it seems that the beginning arrives in our lives uninvited, stays way too long (the middle), and the end seems nowhere in sight. But holding to the thought that grief will pass through the beginning, to the middle, and finally to the end. My experience tells me that the “end” is often different for each of us.
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So many things in life are about loss: death, losing a job, saying goodbye to a dear friend, moving away, retiring. The list is endless. Life is often about saying goodbye, and letting go is difficult.
Pearl of Wisdom #2
During the yoga class, I glanced at the clock quite a few times. Thoughts of “how much longer??!!”, “How long have we been working our thighs??” “What time will I get back home?” filled my head. I’m sure many of my classmates suffered the same thoughts. It seems that many of my fellow students couldn’t resist the urge to check the time – often during the hour. Our ever observant yoga leader took notice and offered the words “Time is an illusion. Now is all we have. Enjoy the now.” The words helped me stop the parade of thoughts and focus on the present.
And so it is with grief and loss. All too often, we seem to be unable to stop thinking about what was, or what we want to be, rather than the now. I know that the difficult challenge when one suffers a loss is letting go. Moving forward takes time in the grief process. But a gentle reminder to ourselves to enjoy something about the now will help us, soothe us, and possibly give us the strength we need to move forward, even if moving forward is just one small step. So many things in life are about loss: death, losing a job, saying goodbye to a dear friend, caregiving, moving away, or retiring. The list is endless since life is often about saying goodbye, and letting go is difficult.
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The yoga lesson offered me so much more than physical exercise. Accepting the wisdom of “everything has a beginning, middle, and end” and “enjoy the now” touched me because I was open to the message. I hope you are too open to the message.